Independent’s Day

Johnno and Janno were still exalting the recent ‘Independent’s Day.’ With ten seats won by Independents, all but one being women. Janno kept playing the Eurythmics “Sisters are doin’ it for themselves” in celebration. The six so-called Teal seats being taken from previously rock-solid Liberal seats. The end result being, Labour after nine years in opposition returned as the government, with a one seat majority.

In contrast to the Teals and Greens who recruited record numbers of community volunteers and employed mega door-knocking, Clive and the UAP, demonstrated their Freedom, Freedom, Freedom to spend over $70 million painting the Murdoch media Yellow and Black, and win no seats. Proving money talks, and in this case it just said, ‘Au Revoir.’

‘So much for our erstwhile Prime Minister, man of the people, so call me Scomo. Unfortunately he ended up with a trust deficit lower than the Mariana Trench and as a result dragged his Teal facing Libs into the chasm with him,’ said Johnno. ‘Echoing another pivotal revolutionary act of Independence in Boston, we had the Kooyong Teal Party. From Treasury to Tribulation, Gosh no Josh. Then in true Scomo style, he tries to dismiss it all by saying “the voters were just changing the curtains.” No - Scomo, with middle finger raised, they were giving you the final curtain call.

'Good to see the Libs recognising the poor image problems that caused their demise, and as a consequence electing the previous Minister for Empathy, Peter Dutton, as their new leader.

'Then Barnaby, I’m a man of the country people, hence the hat, finally rides off into the sunset, to the sounds of Paul McCartney’s “Despite Repeated Warnings.”

'And if that wasn’t enough during the week, the delicious irony of the new Foreign Minister with the surname Wong, warning of the dangers of Chinese intrusion into the Pacific Islands.

'Also good to see Prime Minister Albonesia getting off to a great start, not forgetting the name of the US President.’

'So what do you think of the Quad?’ Enquired Alphy.

’Who in their wildest dreams post the Second World War, would have thought that the US & Australia would be in an alliance with Japan of all countries, to counter aggressive expansion into the Asia Pacific.

’So we would do well to remember that in the fullness of time, today’s enemy can become your ally and vice-versa. But I think it could be many, many, decades before Russsia and Ukraine are “Brothers in Arms.” Appropriately, an album produced by Dire Straits.’

Unfortunately for the Saps thought Alphy, they were equally adept at killing each other within their national borders. Alphy was observing the Saps yet again, exhibiting their primitive and uncivilised behaviour. The mass shootings in Texas. He had reported back to AC, that the previous US President’s reaction to the shooting was, ‘the answer to a Bad Guy with a gun, is a Good Guy with a gun.’ The Centaurians were incredulous at the response. Some had commented half-jokingly that the Saps should be Euthanised and let the Dolphins take over. ‘The only answer to a bad species with guns, is to replace them, with a good species, with fins.’

'More people have died from gun violence in the last fifty years within the US, than from all the wars that Americans have died in, since the original Revolutionary War in 1775. It’s a failed State.’ said Johnno. ‘The tipping point was reached a long time ago,’ said Janno, ‘and it’s hard to see how it will ever recover.’ Alphy shook his head in sad agreement. He decided not to report these comments back to AC, as he feared he would have been recalled, and the Saps put into the ‘critically endangered - intervention not warranted’ category.

'Makes you think’ said Alphy, ‘Putin and Xi must be smiling to themselves, when they hear Trump and the NRA defend the status quo of gun ownership. It’s the equivalent of having a permanent team of embedded terorrists, constantly killing and maiming your enemy.’

Robert Stygall