Au Revoir? Non - Adieu

Well so much for the diplomacy of the Australian Saps thought Alphy. ‘So how did you think Australia handled giving the French the bad news?’ Asked Alphy of Johnno. ‘Well that has stuffed it for future holidays in France. I used to make sure in cafés and wine bars, that I let the staff know I came from Australia, to avoid getting crap service being mistaken for a Pom. Now I’ll have to pretend to be a Kiwi, Fesh and Cheps sil vous plait.’

‘So what do you think of the decision to cancel the French submarine program and instead go to nuclear powered submarines from the UK and US?’ ‘Tres Bonza. It was the right decision if we want to avoid being a Chinese take-way in the future,’ he replied. ‘So are you worried about having a nuclear reactor in the port of a major Australian city in the future?’ ‘Yes what about Chernobyl and Fukushima,’ said Janno. ‘Well there has never been an accident on a US submarine,’ said Johno. ‘Besides they are likely to be in port at Adelaide, so that wouldn’t be much of a loss if it did happen,’ he said with a smirk.

Alphy had recently reported back to AC (Alpha Centauri) that the Saps were still stuck with dangerous Fission technology having spent decades trying unsuccessfully to crack Fusion power. Given the Chinese context, Alphy would loved to have been able to tell Johnno and Janno that back on AC, energy was Confucian. Well nearly. Every site had a mini Clean Orbital Nuclear Fusion cell, commonly referred to as Confusion.

The key question was, would the Saps ever get to safe Fusion without destroying themselves with Fission?

Alphy noted that the Saps had a Treaty for the Non-Proliferation of Nuclear Weapons. Notable countries that had never signed being India, Pakistan and Israel. From what Alphy had observed the proliferation of nuclear weapons was continuing unchecked and as for trying to eliminate them, Johnno would no doubt have summed it up as, ’Fucking Fission Impossible’.

In Melbourne, Alphy noted that lock-down fatigue had well and truly taken over. Melbourne now apparently holding the world record for the longest number of days spent in lock-down. The sense was, that the rules were being routinely ignored by a significant minority.

Both Johno and Janno had been double-vaxed. (Alphy had already administered his own vaccine equivalent, using his AC knowledge of DNA manipulation. He also easily forged his vaccine certificate). Johno in particular was going ‘stir crazy’ being confined to a 15km radius and no indoor social interactions. The weekend of the Grand Final had been the ‘final straw’ and he had gone and joined a small group of friends to watch the game at a ‘Grannie barbie’. When Janno challenged him about going he pointed out he was safely double-vaxed. ‘But that doesn’t stop you being a carrier.’ ‘Well this is now the disease of the unvaccinated, so Darwinian selection will take its toll,’ he said with a smirk.

It transpired he was not alone in transgressing and the Covid case numbers subsequently surged.

Elimination was now seen as futile. The race was now on to get to the magical threshold of 80% full vaccination, and the promise was that freedoms would return when achieved. This was all part of the ‘road-map’ the Victorian Government had published for the exit out. Johno on seeing the ‘road-map’ for the first time had ‘celebrated’ by playing AC/DC’s ‘Highway to Hell’, and he and Janno had enthusiastically screamed out the lyrics.

Meanwhile, in Canberra, Prime Minister Scott, (man of the people so call me Scomo,) Morrison was considering whether to attend the Glasgow Climate Change Conference. Unfortunately he was straddling the barbed-wire fence. On one side his new Aukus besties, Joe and Boris, were demanding Australia agree to net-zero emissions by 2050. And on the other side the renegade members of his so-called coalition partners led by Barnaby (don’t mention the infidelity) Joyce, refusing to accept the demise of coal, (and the associated votes and political contributions it delivers). Alphy was always amused as to how Sap politicians behaved, constantly sacrificing principles and long term strategy in the pursuit of re-election, and he was curious to see, bearing in mind the barbed-wire fence analogy, how Scomo was going to avoid this potential ‘balls-up’ scenario.

Finally, in Sydney, Gladys continued the long and fine tradition of New South Wales politicians and announced her resignation as Premier due to ongoing corruption investigations by ICAC, (Independent Commission Against Corruption). Janno felt sorry for Gladys. ‘She was obviously deceived by her infatuation with her ‘dodgy’ partner at the time. Love is blind.’ ’ There are none so blind as those who will not see,’ Johnno retorted Swiftly.